Short-term memory loss and its complications and frustrations and ideas of how to help.
The advice of, ‘Never argue; Try not to get cross’ still holds good with me.
Recently, while having coffee with a young mum, I had four telephone conversations with my Aunt on exactly the same topic. The young mum, who had been listening-in, commented on the fact that it was like having a conversation with her 4-year-old daughter.
I agreed, except for two serious differences, which I went on to explain:
- You can say to your 4-year-old, “What did I just explain to you?”, but, because my Aunt simply does not know that she is repeating the conversation, she cannot answer questions about anything prior to the current conversation.
- While an angry or raised voice may work with a child, it would be a lost cause with my Aunt, making her surprised and bewildered. She is simply unaware of the repeated calls.
My Aunt has many lucid intervals, and when talking to her about forgetfulness I talk about how I deal with my own forgetfulness, to make it less threatening, keeping it light and humorous.
For instance, I describe to her how my memory was like a library full of shelves where memories are stored. Unfortunately, every now and then, usually at a critical time, the Librarian in charge either goes ‘absent without leave’ or perhaps just sulks under the desk, leaving my request unanswered. Aunt enjoys these sessions, and at these times can identify with, and reflect on, problems that occur with ageing.
Thanks to Terry Pratchett.
